The conversation was via my cell phone to my parents’ home phone, Christmas Day:
Dad: Did Santa visit you?
Me: Yep. Did Santa visit you?
Dad: Yes.
Me: Did he leave a lot of coal?
Notice, I left off the crucial phrase “in your stockings.” I think if I had said “coal in your stockings”, everything might have been a little clearer. I’m not entirely sure that I didn’t say it, but we’ll assume I didn’t.
Dad: What?
Mom: No, we didn’t get much gold.
Me: What?
Mom: We didn’t get much gold.
Me: I guess I need to spell it. I said did you get much coal, you know, C – O -…
Mom: …L – D. No, it hasn’t gotten cold yet. It’s cool, though. It’s supposed to get cold tomorrow.
Me: No, COAL. Did you get much COAL?
Mom: Oh. Well, I got a few things from Kohl’s.
Me: No, no! COAL. C – O -A -L!
True story.